Match.com Murderer and "Freak of the Week"

News Flash...you can lie online!  As my previous posts have mentioned, lying online isn't very hard!  People posing as regular guys "looking for love" could really be stalkers, freak shows, sexual deviants (although this one I might allow), chester the molesters or even murderers.  


Enter...Abraham Fortune.


The story broke at the end of July that a freed convicted killer was looking for love (aka his next target) on Match.com.  His name is Abraham Fortune, convicted of murdering two people back in 1979 and only served 11 years of his life sentence.


He told potential "Lady Friends" he was much younger than he is, more attractive than he could ever be and a great loyal companion (until you rat him out to the cops...then things get ugly).  Convicted killer doesn't really get you any after-work drinks or sext-messages!


While Match.com finally figured out his true identity and banned him from the website, I did some digging and came up with what his profile might have looked like online!




His Stats:                                      

It turns out he also embellished a bit on his picture (Exhibit A) when he really looked like, well...a murder (Exhibit B).

Exhibit A

Online

Exhibit B

In Person 

(may I say that shirt screams I just got out of jail!)

"Freak of the Week"


This 23 year old from NY sent me a wink and tried to IM me online (IMing on Match.com is a whole different post for another day)


His Stats:

Stage 3? What does that mean? Are you likening yourself to cancer?  Or are you implying that you are a clinger, but not experienced enough to be a Stage 5?  Yet another weird screen name guy...NOT OK.

Also, below you will find a series of weird images taken by our mystery man all of which are shot by himself in front of a mirror.  Does this kid not have any friends?  Totally bizarre.  There is however ONE picture not taken by himself in a mirror.  Scroll to the bottom to view exhibit A.  The angle implies he PUT HIS CAMERA ON THE GROUND AND SET UP THIS PHOTO SHOOT HIMSELF!

Exhibit A

Sweet Living Room Pic

Awesome Hallway Pic

Kick Ass Bedroom Pic complete with Madras Quilt*

Putting your camera on the ground and posing in front of your car in your [parents] drive 

= NOT GETTNG LAID

*(Yikes..your QUILT  doesn't even want you to get laid )

This guy also had the following info under pets (exhibit B).  I like animals as much as the next person, but this is just a bit much.  He basically is saying..."I am a HUGE freak who has a bunch of weird fish, who hasn't seen a boob in 3 years and I  watch my fish get it on...in my room...alone...at night." You have a weird hobby breeding fish, taking pictures of yourself ALONE in front of mirrors and you have a weird screen name/quilt...this is why you are single.

Exhibit B