Status Update.
Week 4, 5 Dates
The Stats thus far (26 days in)
Winks I've Sent: 47 (Winking is like poking on facebook...kind of creepy)
Winks I've Received: 76
Emails I've Sent: 57
Emails I've Received: 86
Profile Views: 1056
Dates I've had: 5
Freak Count: 4
Date #5. Stats are below.
I met him at a nice enough rooftop bar in midtown after a slew of text messages. He texted me 3 times the day of just to confirm. Below are some of the excerpts that I was able to get from my phone right before we met. Also, please note the length and number of texts...very intense!
He was MUCH shorter than his profile said, again see *profile exaggeration*....He probably was 5'4" on his best day and he just LOOKED TINY. He was super excited, almost too much so. He was very chatty, to the point where I would just talk so I didn't have to listen to his crazy stories (The kind of stories that just keep going on and on and don't even have a point).
He was sweet and nice, but it was somewhat like talking to a 70 grandmother who knew all of the gossip in town. Tons of hand gestures, crazy laugh, totally into trash talking about celebs and just a little weird.
I proceeded to keep drinking to dull the pain of the date, until we finally got kicked out because the bar was closing! YES. Saved by the early "last call". I was glad to be leaving..just drunk enough to be pleasant, ready to say goodnight...then out of nowhere, BUTT GRAB AND LIP LOCK. Not ok...I'm not sure what part of our conversation made him think I was asking for this..but he came at me. I was like a deer in headlights and he was like a shark just coming at me with his big teeth and tongue all over the place.
It was quit offensive to say the least...his teeth even hit mine. What did my teeth ever do to you that you feel the need to BASH them against yours? The kiss was just all over the place. I should have known from his over zealous attitude that this would happen, but I was ill equipped seeing as I dulled my senses with the drinks he bought me.
The worst part is that he INSISTED on taking me home in a cab. At first I thought it was sweet, until he tried to kiss me again. Wtf? Did he not see my facial reaction after the first kiss? Ugh. However, the second time we kissed I did feel a little something...but it was more of a deja vu from middle school.
The way he kissed me was like he had never felt a boob before and we were in 6th grade in my friend's basement playing spin the bottle.
The teeth bashing and tongue lashing (literally), eager beaver attitude and your old lady ways tell me...this is why you are single.
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